If it’s meant to be, we will meet again

I’ve decided to relocate the blog to elsewhere. Friends and family will get a notice of my new blog’s address. It won’t be under the same persona handle, because the whole purpose of relocating to a new blog address is to avoid a certain current reader. I’m sorry to other readers who are not friends and family but are interested in reading my blog. If it’s meant to be, we will meet in the blogsphere somewhere else online again.

In the News–Key to a good marriage is to share housework?!

“The Pew Research Center survey on marriage and parenting found that children had fallen to eighth out of nine on a list of factors that people associate with successful marriages — well behind sharing household chores, good housing, adequate income, a happy sexual relationship, and faithfulness.” “The popular culture is increasingly oriented to fulfilling the fantasies and desires of adults. Child-rearing values — sacrifice, stability, dependability, maturity — seem stale and musty by comparison.” http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/sns-ap-marriage-survey,1,442054.story?coll=chi-news-hed&ctrack=2&cset=true

I wonder if this survey indicates that the majority of our generation is just out to find a business partner for material improvement when seeking marriage. When I think of a good marriage, I think about solid emtional bonding and growth. For people who has the emtional readiness and financial stability to have children, I can’t think of other better ways of bonding than raising kids together. I don’t think everyone has the preference to raise kids and the maturity to be good parents, but I am shocked to find out this is the majority of our generation. Sure the labor of love can be infused into many other common projects undertaken by a couple. For example, building a garden, a community charity, or a family business. But in my opinion only the lucky people get to experience the pride and joy of being an important part of the lives of their children and grandchildren. As one song lyric says, “when you love someone, you see your future child in her/his eyes.”

Having fun photographing

I’ve been having fun photographing Wellesley this week. I got a portrait of Wellesley that I really like. Wellesley is not camera-shy at all! I love Wellesley.

Dreamed about photographing

I dreamed about photographing twice already in the past two weeks. It’s a sign that I miss photography and I should really work on my photography. However, I don’t have the energy to go out this weekend. I’d been ill from food poisoning for the past week. I miss my late grandma whenever I get sick. She had always nursed me back to good health ever since I was a kid.

In the News–Equal Marriage Right is secure for now

Today the opponents to same-sex marriage failed to put a ban on current equal marriage freedom in MA. But it’s annoying to think they can try to put a ban again in 2012. Hopefully our society will be more progressive, open, and loving by that time.

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/06/14/us/154cnd-gay.html?hp

Had a relaxing weekend

What I did for the past two weekends were basically designing and promoting my designs.

I don’t have to put in overtime hours at work, which is really great–because I get to work on my designs and spend time with Wellesley. Everyday Wellesley and I started the day with a snuggle and said good night with a snuggle. Whenever I look at how happy Wellesley is to see me arrive home, I feel I’m really lucky and loved. The interesting thing is, Wellesley would remind me to have meal and take breaks! It would come to get me off my computer, wanted me to take a walk with it, and would lead me to the kitchen. At first I didn’t make the connection that Wellesley wanted me to have meal. I checked Wellesley’s food and water. I didn’t understand why it just stood there looking at me without eating or drinking but wouldn’t let me leave kitchen. Then after a few times I made the connection that Wellesley was waiting for me to have my meal on time regularly because I would be “allowed” to leave kitchen after I eat something or drink something. It’s really sweet when i realized that Wellesley was looking after my well-being the way it knows how.

Design work picking up steam

Last weekend and this weekend I’ve been working on my design work, both designing and promoting. I was encouraged by customer feedback. Yes, people actually bought my work! I don’t have a million customers yet, but that’s the big goal to aim for.

Yesterday I stopped by at a co-worker’s housewarming party briefly. I’m not sure if I’ll go to another picnic party later today. I like socializing as much as working. On top of that, I need to spend family time with Wellesley, which is also important to me. I’ve not been spending as much time with Wellesley, because I’ve been working overtime at work during the weekdays on a special project that I got drafted to participate. It’s exciting to learn new things and getting acquainted with people at new department through the project, but it’s quite exhausting. It’s too bad I don’t have enough time and energy to do all the things I want to pursue in life. It looks like I’ll have to opt out of this year’s member show at my usual gallery because I haven’t produce any new photography work that I like to show.

painting now

I’m so glad this weekend I have the free time to watch a documentary on Picasso and was inspired enough to paint with painter on computer.  I think I paint a lot faster now than I used to.

Supportive love is the basic prevention method

Of all the news relating to the killer of recent VT rampage, I was most touched by the English teacher who risked her life to tutor him one-on-one and discussed the importance of friendship with him. Unfortunately she wasn’t a professional counselor and she didn’t succeed in pulling him back from his lonely isolation.

When I look at how this tragic rampage could’ve been prevented, I look beyond the college’s failed e-mail warning system or how we should’ve locked him away from our view when he felt suicidal after rejection from girls or when he thought he could write like Stephen King. I think the best prevention to a problem is to make sure it wasn’t a problem to begin with. In my humble opinion, the prevention had to start from the killer’s childhood developmental stage.

Reportedly the killer was taunted as a child repeatedly. He muttered when he spoke, and was a child immigrant trying to fit in.

Many kids experienced being taunted at school, but not all of them grew up to seek revenge by hurting strangers. Reported by Chicago Tribune, Senator Obama was taunted by his classmates as a child when he lived overseas in Indonesia because he didn’t speak the language. As a teen in Hawaii, he also had to deal with the situation of being a biracial man in our divided American Society. However, Senator Obama grew up to be a very accomplished person and is now a presidential candidate. And I think it had to do with the amount of love and support he received from his family and friends.

At this point very little report was on the VT killer’s formative years. All we know is that his parents worked long hours to provide for the family. His sister, who had grew up in the same household, went to Princeton and is doing well as a contributing member of society. Typically in Asian families, the male child receives more attention and as a result, has also higher expectation to achieve. I wonder if the pressure had made him to become more withdrawn.

Reportedly the killer ranted against “rich kids.” Unfortunately in today’s society where commercials are trying to sell many products to kids, some kids base their self-esteem on what they own instead of what they can contribute. Some parents are too busy making money to fulfill the material satisfaction/peer comparison pressure of their kids, and not spending time to instill the right attitude about life in their kids.

I think kids need to be taught to focus on the good parts of life and to not to dwell on the less-than-ideal parts of life. If I had a kid I’d tell my kid that “when you encounter a mean person, think of all the other nice persons you’ve crossed path with and don’t let anger build up in you. When you wonder if you should be nice to someone, think that you might just be the only nice person that particular person has ever crossed his/her path with. It is cool to be nice. It is not cool to be bad. If you are popular in class, it’s your responsibility as a leader to reach out to the less-popular crowd and try to create harmony among different groups of classmates.”

The picture painted about the killer was that he had been a loner since childhood, and that he didn’t allow anyone to get close to him. He had always been very quiet since he was a child, according to New York Times interview of his Korean family members. I wonder if he was quiet by choice, or by circumstances. Reportedly he seemed to have some speech problem, because he muttered when he spoke. I wonder if that speech problem had been corrected early on, he would have more confidence to speak. Here is a story I have to share: I know of a kid in my class, all the sudden he stopped smiling, and one day he told us he hardly smiled was because a classmate made fun of his yellow color teeth. Later on, a friend of us told him she had seen worse teeth than his and at least his teeth were all so nicely aligned. Being complimented by a girl, he regained his self-confidence and smiled again. Sometimes some people just have frail self-images, which a kind word or two from others can really lessen their self-consciousness.
I also think that we need to reduce the portrayal of violence in media, video games, and movies. These unhealthy images sure have negative effect on the impressionable minds. People often become numb about something if it’s been overexposed. I don’t even let my cat watch any TV show in which there were people yelling. If yelling frightened a cat, imagine what effect it has to a human child.

Chicago on international stage

Chicago was voted America’s nominee to be host city for the 2016 Olympics. Yay!